


Longing

by Hitomi_G



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
Genre: Acceptance, Commitment, Denial of Feelings, Feelings Realization, Growing Old, Growing Up, Implied Relationships, Long-Distance Relationship, M/M, Nostalgia, Post-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-16
Updated: 2020-04-16
Packaged: 2021-03-01 16:47:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23680306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hitomi_G/pseuds/Hitomi_G
Summary: Dino keeps trying to maintain what's left of his long-distance relationship with Hibari, not really caring if the other is purposely building a wall to keep him away. Everyone else is doing their best to keep them together.
Relationships: Dino/Hibari Kyouya
Comments: 2
Kudos: 14





	Longing

**Author's Note:**

> This is basically a bittersweet take on Hibari's and Dino's relationship after the canon events of the story. It's not really meant to depict any specific feeling, but feel free to interpret it you own way. I hope you like it~

_**LONGING** _

It isn't hard, not really. Not expecting him has become more of a habit than actually doing so. Receiving and ignoring direct orders from the Vongola brat as well as operating his own under-the-law Namimori public order protection business have taken most of his time anyway, so he doesn't really have time to think about him, nor that he does so, at least not voluntarily. Sometimes Kusakabe mentions his name or the name of some of his subordinates, as if keeping in touch with Ivan and Romario was just another excuse for him to address the elephant in the room, the one both of them know very well is there, but Hibari keeps denying and blatantly ignoring.

Cavallone's men drop by sometimes when they travel to Japan without him for errands. They leave letters, presents, flowers and the likes, and Hibari has Kusakabe deliver them to his bedroom, where he almost never is, so in the end he reads the letters too late, leaves most of the presents unopened and the flowers die without anyone taking care of them. Hibari usually uses the dried petals as bookmarks of his favorite book passages, but nothing else. He also doesn't really care about the presents or about the content of the letters. They are all written in code, a stupidly easy one to figure out to Hibari's standards, and most of them are just retellings of the same things Tsunayoshi has already filled him up with. Truth be told, if Cavallone didn't put so much effort into constantly reminding Hibari of his existance, he probably would have forgotten about him long ago, the same way he has forgotten about most of the people he hears about during his brief and scarce meetings with the other Guardians. Sometimes he recognizes a name, but he can't put a face to it, or remember their position or the role they've played within the Family. It's like for some reason everyone, not only Cavallone himself, was forcing him to hold on to whatever kind of relationship he has with the capo.

Hibari finds it ridiculous. They can spend months, even years, without seeing each other, Hibari only knowing about him because of those insistent attempts to stay in his life even though any form of communication is shortly cut by Hibari never responding to any of them. Hibari knows about Dino, he knows what he's up to, he constantly hears about him from Tsunayoshi and Kusakabe, but as far as he knows, Dino doesn't know anything about him anymore, at least no more than the things he hears from Romario or his so called "little brother", which are superficial matters anyway, so why is it that he and the others insist so much on reminding him?

  
"You should reply to his letters", "Romario says Cavallone-dono sends you his greetings", "Dino-san asked me to wish you a happy birthday". Wasn't it all stupid?

  
Cavallone could go fuck himself for all Hibari cared, because if he actually had wanted him to keep in touch, he would have stayed. He would have understood that Hibari wasn't going to commit to a long distance relationship knowing that the only thing he is fully commited to is his job, and especially aknowledging that they were separated by thousands of kilometers, by thousands of problems to deal with and by the tremedous amount of people interested in both of them at their disposal. Hibari had told him that. He had adviced him to just forget about everything, to sleep with others, he wouldn't care, hell, he wouldn't even know. He would do the same anyway. Dino had only laughed and nodded, but then continued to find a way to approach him in spite of their circumstances.

Hibari doesn't even remember tagging their relationship as anything at all. "Lovers", "Fuckbuddies", "Intimate Colleagues", Hibari could never tell, and neither him nor Dino made it clear anyway. No feelings were expressed from any of them. While they were still "together", while Cavallone was still a constant part of his everyday life during the trainings and the preparations of Tsunayoshi to take over his position, Hibari admited to himself to be fond of him, to not hate him, to feel some sort of affection towards the man that had already long surpassed the lust and attraction from when they first had met, and Hibari was no fool to Dino's reciprocation, they just never got to put any of that into words. It felt too out of character, too unnecessary, Dino MUST have known anyway, why else would he have continued to indulge him if not? But everything has changed since then. To Hibari it feels impossible to hold onto those feelings, what would be the point? He appreciated the details at first, but now it's become too much of a burden to keep pretending there's anything left of them, so why doesn't Dino just give up on him and stops his self-loathing? Or is he maybe waiting for Hibari to put an end to it? And if so, aren't the obvious signals that Hibari is sending him enough warning? Is Hibari not being clear enough? Moreso, why does Hibari feel that if it all comes to him actually saying the words that would forever break their attempt of a relationship, he won't be able to pronounce them?

And so the years and months pass, and season after season Dino still reminds Hibari that he is still thinking about him and that he has no plans of forgetting anytime soon, and Hibari learns to live with that. He comes to accept the fact that this is something that will never change, that Dino's place is in Italy and his is in Namimori, that they will continue growing old barely hearing from each other and that a day will come in which one of them, probably Hibari due to the age difference if the risks of their line of work don't intervene first, will find out that the other has passed away and will be left with the choice of either silently mourning from home or actually taking some time to visit the other's resting place to say his goodbyes while waiting for his own time to arrive.

  
So Hibari doesn't complain, and that's the reason why not waiting for him, not thinking or talking about him and not expecting anything from him have become mere acts out of habit, so when those few times in which they can be reunited again come they can just peacefully enjoy the company of the other knowing that everything is, and will always stay, the same for them.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. Please be free to comment if you liked this story and to let me know of any grammar/spelling mistakes so I can correct them~


End file.
